OFW Journals (OFW Stories on the News) and Some OFW Employment, Career & Business Tips

Horse Sense - The horseman eagerly shouted his services “Sir, kabayo kayo!” Startled, my uncle shouted back,”Kabayo ka rin

One summer, we took our balikbayan (returning resident) uncle to Tagaytay Ridge Park. He had left the Philippines for the United States 20 years back. He has since then built a name for himself in the medical profession in Pennsylvania..

As our car approached the parking area, several horsemen followed us, each one eager to offer a ride on their horses. One intrepid horseman got ahead of the pack. He managed to squeeze his horse close enough to our car.

As my uncle got out of the car, the horseman eagerly shouted his services “Sir, kabayo kayo!” Startled, my uncle shouted back,”Kabayo ka rin!

(Notes on the nuances of the dialogue in Tagalog: The statement of the horseman, “Sir, kabayo kayo!” literally means “You look like a horse.” However, it is used here figuratively, i.e. “Would you like a ride on my horse?” My uncle replied with annoyance - in jest, of course - to the literal meaning. He said, “You look like a horse yourself!”)

Tsinoy says: Of course, my uncle’s retort elicited laughter from everyone. Our laughter was prompted by the irony of it all. We all held him in high esteem. He graduated with honors from a prestigious school - Harvard. He even taught medicine in that university. In short, he’s a self-made man - and a successful one from all accounts - only to be hurled an insult as “horse-faced”;.

This reminds me of a passage in Lao Tzu’s Tao Te Ching which goes Truthful words are not beautiful,
Beautiful words are not true.
The wise man is not learned.
The learned man is not wise.
The good are not many.
The many are not good.

The words we use to describe someone or something is a function of the mind. A wise man may be knowledgeable about the external traits of a person, or the technical details of things. However, our understanding will not be complete if we base it only on outward appearance. We may have acquired knowledge of the form, but not necessarily its function (form vs. substance). This is what Lao Tzu meant when he said that the learned is not wise.

Herein lies the secret of getting into a meaningful relationship. We need to take time simply to observe, to look at the relationship with tolerance and a quiet mind until we begin to see the deeper layers of the other’s being. You’ll be surprised. Your attitudes toward the other person will change.

So, the next time you meet someone, don’t be quick to dismiss him or her as a dimwit, as he/she may be wiser than you in the ways of the world; or as a corrupt public official, as he/she may be more virtuous than you. The other person is more that the sum of his/her physical traits.

That other person has a soul. And if we want to see the other’s soul, we have to go beyond our judgements, intentions and expectations.

If you feel the urge to call someone horse-faced, do hold your tongue. He might just turn out to be someone whom you can turn for help unconditionally. He could be a caregiver throughout most of his life, just like my uncle.

Cheers.

Tsinoy

Source: http://www.geocities.com/waho047/kabayo.html (published with permission)